You know these people: There is never anything good about the situation in which they happen to be in presently. It will always be better when……or it would be better if only…. or they can’t wait until…….They move around in their life looking either forward to things or reminiscing over events from the past. They exist in a space in constant oscillation between nostalgia for lost times and impatience about things to come!
They move from relationship to relationship, from job to job, from place to place – and there is always something wrong that makes the “old times” appear idyllic – or a look forward to when things will be improved. They say things like: “I can’t wait until I retire”, “I hate my job”, “things were better in the old days”, “people were smarter/better back when”.
And they find themselves stuck in this rat-race of present day reality. And since they are ever looking forward or backward – they find that this very moment is passing them by. And lo and behold a decade later they look back at how things were right now – and find it to be so much better than how things became. Retirement was not at all all it was cracked up to be, the next job or relationship was actually “worse”, the town they moved to was either too big or too small – and disillusionment invariably sets in again and again.
Recognize this? Well, I do believe we all have this tendency in our thought process from time to time. And without fail it is a sign to stop up and smell the roses – to realize that fantasizing about the past or longing for the future is not living. What once was and what is to come is merely memories or projections.
So next time you encounter a “grass is always greener on the other side” person, or you find that tendency in yourself, just stop and notice that you are doing it. “I am now living in the past or the future”. Then take a look at how you might be able to switch into action mode. What incentives can you do to bring your energy into the present moment? What is it about the past or what hope about the future is it that you miss in your current situation? How can you start bringing these lacking elements right into your present day reality? What is right about where you are at this very moment? And what can you do to change it to make it even better? What step(s) can you take right now?
Before you know it you might find that instead of walking around looking over the fences of time to the pastures of past and future, you start watering the grass under your feet here and now. And who knows – the color green might be there right under your own feet!
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